It's Hot Today, So You Can Wear Shorts

"It's hot today, so you can wear shorts."

Have you ever found yourself asking an active, capable four-year-old to get dressed, but he ignores you? What do you do next?

Ask him again, and again? Or do we take him by the hand and walk him to his room, talking about the weather outside, while we pick the shorts together?

We help him put them on and mention how soon he'll be able to do this all by himself. That will be a fun day, because then he'll get to pick the shorts he wants to wear.

Showing him how to do it, and helping him do it, is in some ways like training an employee to do a task. We show them once or twice — three times if needed, maybe more with a four-year-old — then give them a chance to do it themselves, offering help as needed until they can do it without us.

Why does doing that with our own children seem more difficult than it is?

We could list many circumstances. But if we look at it as simple training — the teaching of how to dress himself — we won't get frustrated by the help we need to provide in the short term.

All kids do learn how to dress themselves. Some just take longer than others. And one day, they don't need our help anymore. They get to pick their own shorts.

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